Why So Overwhelmed? Distinguishing School Stress, Burnout, and Anxiety in Teens

When Overwhelm Becomes the New Normal

If your teen seems more irritable, tired, or “checked out” lately, you’re not alone. Many parents are noticing that their once-driven, social, or easygoing teen now seems weighed down by stress. Between demanding schoolwork, extracurriculars, and social pressures, the line between normal school stress and something more serious—like burnout or anxiety—has become increasingly blurred.

As a therapist who works with adolescents and young adults, I often hear parents say things like, “I think they’re just overwhelmed,” or “They’ve always been able to handle it, but something’s different now.” Understanding why your teen feels so overwhelmed—and knowing how to tell stress, burnout, and anxiety apart—can help you intervene early and provide meaningful support.

1. Understanding School Stress

Some stress is actually healthy. It motivates teens to study for tests, show up for practice, and push toward their goals. A bit of pressure can build resilience and confidence.

Signs of healthy school stress might include:

• Feeling nervous before a big exam or performance

• Worrying occasionally about grades or results

• Needing rest or downtime after a particularly busy week

This kind of stress tends to pass once the pressure is over. But when stress becomes constant—when your teen feels like there’s never enough time, energy, or motivation to catch up—it can start to take a toll. Chronic school stress can lead to emotional exhaustion, irritability, and eventually, burnout.

2. Recognizing Teen Burnout

Burnout isn’t just an adult problem—it’s showing up in teens more often than ever. It’s what happens when ongoing stress and expectations build up without enough time to rest or recharge. Teens who are used to “doing it all” often push through exhaustion until their bodies and minds simply can’t anymore.

Common signs of burnout in teens include:

• Saying things like, “I just don’t care anymore.”

• Losing interest in activities they once enjoyed

• Declining grades or missed assignments

• Emotional numbness, tearfulness, or irritability

• Fatigue or trouble getting out of bed even after sleep

• Pulling away from family or friends

Burnout often masquerades as laziness or attitude changes, but it’s really a signal that your teen’s emotional tank is empty. They may want to care—but they simply can’t keep up with the same pace.

3. Spotting Teen Anxiety

While stress and burnout are often tied to external pressures, anxiety tends to live beneath the surface. It’s not always linked to one event or deadline—it’s an ongoing sense of unease, worry, or fear that doesn’t go away.

Teens experiencing anxiety often describe feeling “on edge” or “wired but tired.” They might hold it together at school or around friends, only to fall apart once they’re home.

Signs of anxiety in teens may include:

• Constant “what if” thinking or catastrophizing

• Physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, or a racing heart

• Difficulty sleeping, focusing, or relaxing

• Perfectionism and fear of failure

• Avoiding school or social situations

• Overthinking small mistakes or replaying events in their mind

The biggest difference between stress and anxiety is duration. Stress ends when the stressful event does. Anxiety lingers—even when there’s no clear reason to feel on edge.

4. How to Support an Overwhelmed Teen

When your teen is struggling, your response matters more than you might realize. The goal isn’t to fix everything overnight—it’s to create an environment where they feel seen, safe, and supported.

Here are a few ways to help your teen navigate stress, burnout, or anxiety:

• Normalize rest. Encourage your teen to take breaks without guilt. Downtime isn’t wasted time—it’s necessary for mental recovery.

• Model emotional openness. Talk about your own stress in age-appropriate ways. This helps your teen see that it’s okay to ask for help.

• Focus on effort, not just outcomes. Instead of “How did you do on the test?” try, “How did you feel about the test?”

• Build realistic routines. Too many activities, too little sleep, and not enough unstructured time can quickly lead to overwhelm.

• Seek professional support when needed. Therapy can help teens understand the “why” behind their emotions and develop tools for balance and self-confidence.

Small shifts can make a big difference. When teens learn how to manage stress in healthy ways, they build coping skills that last well beyond their school years.

5. When to Reach Out for Professional Help

If your teen’s stress feels constant, their motivation has dropped significantly, or they’ve started avoiding school or social activities, it may be time to reach out for additional support.

Therapy offers a space for teens to express emotions they might not feel comfortable sharing at home. It’s also a place to explore what’s behind their stress—whether it’s pressure to perform, fear of failure, or the growing pains of adolescence—and build a foundation for resilience and balance.

As a therapist who specializes in working with teens and young adults, we work towards moving from overwhelm to understanding. Together, we uncover the reasons behind their stress, burnout, or anxiety and work toward lasting growth—not just a quick fix.

6. Moving From Surviving to Thriving

Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t always mean something is “wrong.” Sometimes it’s a sign that something needs to change—whether that’s expectations, routines, or support systems.

When teens learn to understand their emotions and build healthy coping strategies, they don’t just survive stressful seasons—they thrive beyond them.

If your teen seems stuck in a cycle of stress, burnout, or anxiety, they don’t have to face it alone. Reach out today to schedule a consultation and take the first step toward helping your teen feel grounded, capable, and confident again.